• You may think breastfeeding means you will spend less time with your baby, but feeding is only a small part of being a parent. Bathing, nappy changing, massage, cuddling to sleep and playing are great ways to get to know your new baby. While your baby is feeding, you can sit and chat to your partner or help with meals for the rest of the family, care for your other children or do things that you need to do. When it's not time for a feed, you can enjoy special times with your baby. It's important that baby learns that love can also come without food. Some men find it rewarding to be the one who does some particular event, like bathtime, as they have the most chance of being home consistently for this.

• Pregnancy and breastfeeding change a woman's body. It can be exciting and also worrying at times. However these changes and these feelings are usually normal. Your partner may need reassurance that her body can do what it needs to do to grow and feed this baby. You can provide the emotional support she really needs.

• Mothers and babies both need to learn to breastfeed. Sometimes it takes a little time to work well. If baby has a good birth and is healthy, then breastfeeding often has an easier start. You may not be able to learn the skills of breastfeeding, but you can help your partner to learn how breastfeeding works. You can read about breastfeeding, look at your partners pregnancy books, chat together, and go to breastfeeding education classes before your baby is born.

• Breastfeeding is like any new skill, it gets easier once you know how to do it. At first, you need lots of support and then it becomes much easier. You can help by getting her a pillow if she seems uncomfortable, making sure she has a drink of water handy and being available to chat, make tea, admire her and tell her what a fabulous job she and her body are doing.

• In the first few days, baby needs to breastfeed often. Every 2 hours is normal. Some babies may be tired from the birth, some may still be feeling the effects of drugs given to their mother in labour or not seem very hungry, but it is good for them to have lots of 'practice feeds' at the breast. This will also make sure that plenty of milk is produced and help to stop the breasts from becoming too full and uncomfortable. The more mum and baby feed together, the less problems they are likely to run into.

• Put baby against mother's chest, skin-to-skin. This keeps baby warm and helps trigger baby's instinct to breastfeed. Put your baby against your chest. The first few weeks after baby is born can mean lots of waking during the night. There may be even times when breastfeeding or even parenting seems too hard. It's normal to feel like this some times. Remind each other that it will be easier once you learn more about your baby and remember that you can always ask for help. Things will get better. Get out when your partner feels up to it, bring the baby. Buy a sling, get out for walks. Everything can seem a little overwhelming but the good very very quickly outweighs the difficult patches.

Going out

Mothers can breastfeed their babies anywhere they can legally be. However some mums or their partners are uncomfortable with the idea that other people may be looking at the mother's breasts while she is feeding. Tops that lift up show less skin than ones that need to be unbuttoned. Layering singlet tops and shirts can also give more cover. A wrap or shawl can also help to keep mum and baby covered or warm. Soon breastfeeding while you are out will be easy. Most people don't even notice that baby is being fed. They just see a mum holding her baby close. For mums who prefer extra privacy or babies who have special feeding needs, there are parents' rooms available in most cities and towns where you can feed and change your baby. The more confident that you are in her ability and her right to feed in public, the more confident she will be. Its important if you can to be with her when out and about those first few weeks. Tell her to save the outings where she’ll need to breastfeed for the times when she is with you. You’ll be amazed how much more confident she’ll be when with you.

Support

Let your partner know that she has your support for breastfeeding. Tell other people too. Go on, brag about them. Brag about breastfeeding. Its great! By supporting her, your families and friends will know that breastfeeding is important for your baby and your partner. Mothers have fewer problems breastfeeding when their partners know how important breastmilk is for babies

Not tonight

A woman's body goes through many changes when she is pregnant and then gives birth to a baby. These can make some women lose interest in sex for a while. Sometimes quite a while! This happens to both breastfeeding and bottle-feeding women. Childbirth affects women's sex lives more than breastfeeding does. This has been attributed to fulfilling the need for closeness through having a baby so close to them for so many hours a day and night. They simply are a little “hugged out”. This will return. You will have a sex life again. We promise! After their baby is born, some women experience dryness in the vagina, but this is easily overcome by using lubricating products. Breastfeeding can prolong this. A woman needs her partner to be patient and sensitive as she recovers from the birth experience and gains confidence in breastfeeding and as a mother. Sharing the care of your new baby is a loving act too. Nothing is quite so attractive as seeing your partner with a newborn after all… (or with a hoover…)

Well, we can try to convince you of that one!

Birth Control

Breastfeeding delays the return of a woman's periods and is the basis of one type of birth control (called the Lactational Amenorrhoea Method). There are other contraceptive options available. Breastfeeding is no guarantee! A discussion with your doctor or family planning clinic either before the birth or soon after is a good idea to help you choose the method that's best for you both.

Back to work

Many mothers keep breastfeeding even when they go back to work. Most women feel worried about leaving their babies, and are happy to know that they can keep breastfeeding. As always, its important to have your support. Your partner is doing the best she can possibly do for your child, and returning to work while continuing to breastfeed is an enormous commitment. You should be extremely proud that your partner is giving your baby the very best even in the face of a return to the workplace.

Parenting a new baby can be tiring and challenging, but it is also a very exciting time in your lives and it will soon be past. Enjoy it!

Take time to just cuddle your baby and discover what a precious and unique little person you have brought into the world. You’re amazing as a couple. Look what you’ve made..!

You'll need to look after each other as well.

Love every minute - babyhood doesn't last long!